The Kit Kat Club

Another one of my cats died yesterday (Friday). Well, not really "my" cat. My sister yelena_r0ssini's. I guess I think of all of them as "my" cats since they used to all live in the same house with me, and after we moved, Yahiko, Shinji, and Christabel were all just upstairs in the other apartment.

Yahiko wasn't old or sick. He was chasing a bug, and when he caught it he tried to eat it. And he choked. I didn't even know that could happen. I didn't know cats could choke. I obviously wasn't there, but I imagine that would be such a terrifying thing to see. It's all so strange. I guess of all the cats, I was the least close to Yahiko, the dumb, oversized grey kitty. But he'd still meow incessantly at me and beg for attention whenever I visited. And it's so strange that I wasn't home when it happened. It's like it can't quite hit me, because I haven't seen him in a while anyway. I will miss him, though...poor baby.

I am sick. It is no fun at all. I have become nocturnal, which is even less fun because I missed class on Thursday and Friday, and missed OMTA today. So, blah blah blah, disappointed in myself, depressed and thus sleeping more, thus creating a vicious cycle, SAME DAMN STORY AS EVERY OTHER TIME GOD I'M SICK OF THIS.

Happy Passover! I went to a seder at Professor Magnus' house on Wednesday. It was nice, and much less overwhelming than I'm sure the Kosher-Halal co-op's seder was. All told, there were probably only 20 or so people at the one I attended. The other Oberlin students who came were very friendly and we had a great time, though we managed to knock over pretty much everything that was handed to us. There was a lot of intense discussion about various aspects of the Exodus story, and I learned so much...which I guess isn't saying much, considering the bulk of my Passover knowledge comes from The Prince of Egypt (shut up it is kind of the greatest movie ever).

Tonight I went to see DragonWolf, the Birthday Kids, and Dos Mil Dias de Fuego all play at Harkness. All 3 bands contain some of my best friends, and many of my other friends were in the audience -- so though rock concerts aren't really my thing, nor is Harkness (with the exception of Harris and Ma'ayan's room), it was a very excellent time.

( UH, OK, AWESOME DOCTOR WHO SPECIAL, OR AWESOMEST DOCTOR WHO SPECIAL? )

I will get myself onto a goddamn schedule.
I will go to bed early enough that waking up at 9 is feasible.
I will continue to take vitamins and work on a more balanced diet, with the help of my health-nut girlfriend <3
I will start going to the gym. FRANNY. WE WILL START GOING TO THE GYM.
I will make every effort not to go into freaking hibernation during the cold months.
Addendum: If I find myself going into hibernation, or just getting spectacularly depressed as I so often do in winter, I will DO something about it. Whether that be taking Provigil or buying a sun lamp or anything else -- I won't let myself fall apart.
I will not miss classes so much. For the most part, this semester, it's not such a huge deal if I miss. But the point is I feel like crap about myself when I do. Last night I was up till like 4 a.m hanging out with Franny and Chris, and it was totally worth it, but I overslept and missed my class and have been residing in a pit of self-hatred since then.
I will take my medication every day.
I will continue trying to avoid getting involved with poisonous, manipulative people. It's inevitable that I will have to put up with them now and again, but I will not allow them close to me or into my circle of trust.
I will get a job. This actually may not happen till February, since I go home in a month and I'm home for all of January, but when I get back, I will get a job -- hopefully with Concert Sound, Nora said they'd probably be hiring then.
I will stay the hell away from Oberlin Confessional, no matter how bored I get.
I will take care of myself. I want to be happy, damnit.

Sure, sure, the New Year isn't for a while yet, but these are changes I need to start making NOW.

It's snowing again today :) Lysander was absolutely incredulous when I told him. "Lysander, guess what, it's snowing here!"
Long pause.
"It couldn't."

Then he got mad because it's not snowing in Jersey. It's odd to have to appreciate snow for itself, and not for its snow-day potential because snow days almost never happen on campus. But it is beautiful. And kissing someone in the snow is really nice.
Which brings me to my final resolution: I will try not to screw up this relationship. I will try to be a decent girlfriend. I will not let it become a source of major stress for me.